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When you think of a bathroom, rather public or private, many different things or events may come to mind. It is a place designed and known for relieving oneself, showering or bathing, or beautifying oneself. More recent, the bathroom has become known as a place for checking missed calls, perusing through emails, or checking text messages. But for most women, the bathroom has become more than just a place to do all these things.

For most women, the bathroom has now become her personal sanctuary.

If you have children—human or the furry four-legged kind—they don’t understand sanctuaries or sacred spaces. As soon as you retreat for a moment of solitude, it is very common to hear the pitter-patter of tiny feet approaching the bathroom door. After that, you’ll probably hear a soft (or loud) voice asking you what seems to be a trillion questions! If you pay close attention, you may even see a turn of the knob in an attempt to open the door or some small toy, desperate note or object being slid underneath in order to get your attention.

Moms have often been heard saying that they can’t even use the bathroom in peace. And what woman hasn’t taken a seat or dipped herself into a tub of warm water or stood in a hot shower and struggled to remember what it was like to not feel tired.

Truth is, every day isn’t a great day. For every day that we live, it is not our heart’s desire to be the strong woman that everyone thinks that we should be.  And regardless of how we feel (spiritually, emotionally, or physically), there is still an unspoken expectation and assumption that we have everything under control. Especially during those times when we might feel as though you’re about to lose it.  We are great multi-taskers, but it is because of this innate ability that we have in being female that we often times make things look easy. There are consequences for that and usually results in no one every asking that one simple question, “Are you okay?” And so one of the few places that we can retreat to and allows us to be human is the bathroom.

Have you often wondered (as I often have), how you can give so much of yourself to all of those who are connected to you and unfortunately find yourself subject to releasing and relieving yourself in a bathroom? Or, how you can spend your entire day meeting the demands of people or smiling when you feel like crying and still being subject to such a space?

You may be wondering where it is that I am going with all of this. Let me explain.

There are so many things that are being released when we go to the bathroom. For most women, it is a place where we release tears so no one can see us cry. It is a place where we release fears and anxieties about what tomorrow will bring in addition to what we’ve already prayed for today. The bathroom has become a place where we make ourselves up (literally) to hide the face of the girl who has so many insecurities. Insecure about her weight (either too thick or too skinny), her hair that is either too kinky, too curly, or too straight. Insecure about the bumps on her face or the nose that seems to be too wide. The bathroom is also a place of retreat for the girl who is perfectly gorgeous on the outside, but on the inside struggles daily with never feeling as though she was good enough.

Going to the bathroom is a time where we finally have the moment to be human; feeling no pressure to save the world along with everyone and everything in it. Going to the bathroom allows us those few moments of the day where we can be unapologetically Woman! We can be feminine, vulnerable, and say to ourselves in the mirror that we’re tired and weak. The bathroom is a place where we can be emotionally honest without being subject to the judgment and ridicule of others who would see our truth and call it weakness.

To every woman, although it may seem as though we are miles apart and we may never have the chance to meet in person, just know that I am figuratively in the bathroom stall right next to you!

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