Here We Go Again

Deep sigh.

I thought I was past it but alas, here we are…again.

The scale said 205 pounds.

I felt so defeated.

Five years out from weight loss surgery and I’ve regained weight.

Thankfully, not all of it.

But enough to feel uncomfortable.

Enough for some of my favorite clothes to be unwearable.

My highest was somewhere near 280 lbs and I was miserable.

After having weight loss surgery, I saw 163 lbs for the first time in my adult life. I was about 10 pounds from goal and I felt amazing.

I loved what I was seeing in the mirror.

And let me be clear, I had to fight for that 163 lbs. I wasn’t one of the people who reached their ideal weight with the help of surgery. I plateaued. A lot. And my body was changing. Perimenopause is a real thing and the hormonal changes can thwart the best of weight loss plans.

What I Knew Before Surgery

I knew that surgery was a tool. A scary and risky tool, but a tool just that same. I would have to fix my relationship with food, address my stress eating, and pinpoint my triggers. I did all of that. However, knowing all of that was no match for all the life that unfolded after my Momma’s passing.

I gave in to what I’d always done in stressful times. I turned to food. And not vegetables either. Carbs— warm, creamy, sugary, cinnamony, carbs.

With me running on autopilot and my body changing, the pounds started to pack on.

Rewiring Your Brain

I remember reading a book that shared how habits are formed in the brain. The book talked about loops and triggers and how the brain likes to reserve energy. Have you ever been driving, started to daydream, and still ended up at your destination? The brain recognizes patterns and goes into autopilot so you do things without thinking.

You can eat your way through a box of Cheez-It’s or a bag of Oreos before you even realize you’re eating. And still, have the nerve to be hungry because your brain and belly are not aligned.

Sigh.

I know my triggers.

I have a pretty good handle on the loop that happens in my head that results in me not eating and living like I want to.

So, I’m starting over.

This time, I’m very focused on behavior modification. Because any tool I use to lose weight will again be temporary until I create some new patterns. Teach my brain something new. And guess what? Those old loops and neuropathways do not go away. I repeat. They do not go away.

When I experience a familiar trigger, my brain will want to revert to old programming. It’s up to me to flip to the new programming.

So I’m restarting my weight loss journey.

I’ll be sharing my progress, what I’m eating, how I’m working out, tracking some other health data points, and my appointment with a hypnotherapist over at Fanbase. Some of the content will be available on a subscription basis and some open to the public.

I hope you’ll join me.

Here we go! Again!