One of my favorite quotes says, “None of us leave here unscathed.”
Oddly enough, I find this comforting.
Regardless of what we all see on social media, it reminds me that we all experience the ups and downs that earth-living provides.
Life lifes for each of us.
As a woman in her 50s, I’ve seen my share of storms, and how I handle them now is far different from when I was in my 20s. My younger self—bless her heart—she didn’t know. But each storm taught that young woman survival skills and reassured her that she was always provided for. And for this, I am forever grateful. Shoutout to my younger self for not giving up!
Okay, so here are my five tips to get you through life’s rough patches:
- Remember that storms are temporary events. Your life might be different after said storm but the storm itself is temporary. Remind yourself of this fact as often as needed. The decisions you make during a temporary event can have life-long consequences. If at that moment you can get quiet and get a bird’s eye view of the situation and make decisions from that space, you can save yourself a whole lot of heartache.
- Pinpoint the main issue. When everything happens at once, you immediately dive into trying to fix everything. Everything may not need your immediate attention. All the other things you’re facing are an offshoot of the event. Yes, you’re in a boat, and the waves are crazy and it’s raining but if your boat leaks, patch the leak so your vessel stays afloat and you can deal with the wind and waves knowing that your vessel will sustain you.
- Be careful with your thoughts and words. These conversations if not steeped in compassion, love, and grace will leave you frustrated, disappointed, and bitter. Reassure yourself of what you know is true. Pray, meditate, sit still. Do what you must to settle yourself and your thoughts.
- Find your breath! When we’re blindsided, we typically go into a fight, flight, or freeze state. We do this shallow breathing that keeps our bodies under stress and we produce a whole lot of cortisol. If you’re a woman of a certain age and learning how hormones work, cortisol is the LAST thing you want surging through your body. BREATHE! Go for a walk, do some gentle exercises and movements like yoga, or find some weeds to pull. Being out in nature, and remembering to breathe will help you shift from fight and flight to rest and digest.
- Don’t forget your power. Even in a storm, you are not powerless. Governing yourself during a rough patch is powerful! Coaching yourself through is powerful. When I find myself in one of life’s lifing episodes, it’ll usually disrupt my sleep. After I tire of tossing and turning, I tell myself…”Hey, body! We’re going to sleep!” I find my breath and I start counting down. I do that a couple of times and the next thing I know it’s morning.
Hope this helps!
Peace and love, everybody.
Lisa N. Alexander is the author and founder of This Woman Knows and What Million-Dollar Brands Know. She is an award-winning filmmaker, director, producer, and writer and is the owner of PrettyWork Creative.
